Surf Scoter aka. Skunk-headed Coot (colloq... hurtful)
Bodega Bay, California, USA
Member of the Ducks, Geese, and Swans Family
§A Raft of Ducks§
~true bird fact~ Surf Scoter has surprisingly low amount of interesting facts about him, so instead have a dubiously sourced list of other nicknames this bird has: Goggle-nose, Horse-head Coot (??), Plaster-bill, Snuff-taker (!!), Blossom-billed Coot, Bottle-nosed Diver and Mussel Bill. Actually, about that bill. All that anyone would want to know about a surf scoter is probably 'what's the deal with that bill?' Well, as the last name on the list suggests, it's a very specialized evolutionary tool for Surf Scoter's preferred prey- mussels. The bill is strangely shaped and very strong so that the Scoter can diver into the shallow surf, right where the waves are breaking, to lift up rocks and pry out the mollusks underneath. Why is it so colorful though? Well, like most colorful things in nature, it probably has something to do with attracting a mate. See below a female Surf Scoter. Not quite as fancy looking.
Wouldn't know what to do with free time, if she had any. Maybe weightlifting?
Buys a ton of groceries all at once, in bulk, to avoid unnecessary trips
A huge doofus. Barely has a brain in his head
Defends women over-zealously. This isn't always bad because sometimes he helps, but often it was not needed
Has gotten his haircut at the same place for his whole, and has kept the same hairstyle too